MINA MURRAY'S JOURNAL
Same day, 11 o'clock p. m..--Oh, but I am tired! If it
were not that I had made my diary a duty I should not open
it tonight. We had a lovely walk. Lucy, after a while, was
in gay spirits, owing, I think, to some dear cows who came
nosing towards us in a field close to the lighthouse, and
frightened the wits out of us. I believe we forgot everything, except of course, personal fear, and it seemed to wipe
the slate clean and give us a fresh start. We had a capital
`severe tea' at Robin Hood's Bay in a sweet little oldfashioned inn, with a bow window right over the seaweedcovered rocks of the strand. I believe we should have shocked the `New Woman' with our appetites. Men are more tolerant,
bless them! Then we walked home with some, or rather many,
stoppages to rest, and with our hearts full of a constant
dread of wild bulls.
Lucy was really tired, and we intended to creep off to
bed as soon as we could. The young curate came in, however,
and Mrs. Westenra asked him to stay for supper. Lucy and I
had both a fight for it with the dusty miller. I know it was
a hard fight on my part, and I am quite heroic. I think that
some day the bishops must get together and see about breeding up a new class of curates, who don't take supper, no
matter how hard they may be pressed to, and who will know
when girls are tired.
Lucy is asleep and breathing softly. She has more color
in her cheeks than usual, and looks, oh so sweet. If Mr.
Holmwood fell in love with her seeing her only in the drawing room, I wonder what he would say if he saw her now. Some
of the `New Women' writers will some day start an idea that
men and women should be allowed to see each other asleep before proposing or accepting. But I suppose the `New Woman'
won't condescend in future to accept. She will do the proposing herself. And a nice job she will make of it too!
There's some consolation in that. I am so happy tonight,
because dear Lucy seems better. I really believe she has
turned the corner, and that we are over her troubles with
dreaming. I should be quite happy if I only knew if Jonathan . . . God bless and keep him.
11 August.--Diary again. No sleep now, so I may as well
write. I am too agitated to sleep. We have had such an adventure, such an agonizing experience. I fell asleep as soon
as I had closed my diary . . .Suddenly I became broad awake,
and sat up, with a horrible sense of fear upon me, and of
some feeling of emptiness around me. The room was dark, so I
could not see Lucy's bed. I stole across and felt for her.
The bed was empty. I lit a match and found that she was not
in the room. The door was shut, but not locked, as I had
left it. I feared to wake her mother, who has been more than
usually ill lately, so threw on some clothes and got ready to
look for her. As I was leaving the room it struck me that
the clothes she wore might give me some clue to her dreaming
intention. Dressing-gown would mean house, dress outside.
Dressing-gown and dress were both in their places. "Thank
God," I said to myself, "she cannot be far, as she is only
in her nightdress."
I ran downstairs and looked in the sitting room. Not
there! Then I looked in all the other rooms of the house,
with an ever-growing fear chilling my heart. Finally, I
came to the hall door and found it open. It was not wide
open, but the catch of the lock had not caught. The people
of the house are careful to lock the door every night, so I
feared that Lucy must have gone out as she was. There was no
time to think of what might happen. A vague over-mastering
fear obscured all details.
I took a big, heavy shawl and ran out. The clock was
striking one as I was in the Crescent, and there was not a
soul in sight. I ran along the North Terrace, but could see
no sign of the white figure which I expected. At the edge of
the West Cliff above the pier I looked across the harbour to
the East Cliff, in the hope or fear, I don't know which, of
seeing Lucy in our favorite seat.
There was a bright full moon, with heavy black, driving
clouds, which threw the whole scene into a fleeting diorama
of light and shade as they sailed across. For a moment or
two I could see nothing, as the shadow of a cloud obscured
St. Mary's Church and all around it. Then as the cloud
passed I could see the ruins of the abbey coming into view,
and as the edge of a narrow band of light as sharp as a
sword-cut moved along, the church and churchyard became
gradually visible. Whatever my expectation was, it was not
disappointed, for there, on our favorite seat, the silver
light of the moon struck a half-reclining figure, snowy white.
The coming of the cloud was too quick for me to see much, for
shadow shut down on light almost immediately, but it seemed
to me as though something dark stood behind the seat where
the white figure shone, and bent over it. What it was, whether man or beast, I could not tell.
I did not wait to catch another glance, but flew down
the steep steps to the pier and along by the fish-market to
the bridge, which was the only way to reach the East Cliff.
The town seemed as dead, for not a soul did I see. I rejoiced that it was so, for I wanted no witness of poor Lucy's
condition. The time and distance seemed endless, and my
knees trembled and my breath came laboured as I toiled up
the endless steps to the abbey. I must have gone fast, and
yet it seemed to me as if my feet were weighted with lead,
and as though every joint in my body were rusty.
When I got almost to the top I could see the seat and
the white figure, for I was now close enough to distinguish
it even through the spells of shadow. There was undoubtedly
something, long and black, bending over the half-reclining
white figure. I called in fright, "Lucy! Lucy!" and something raised a head, and from where I was I could see a
white face and red, gleaming eyes.
Lucy did not answer, and I ran on to the entrance of the
churchyard. As I entered, the church was between me and the
seat, and for a minute or so I lost sight of her. When I
came in view again the cloud had passed, and the moonlight
struck so brilliantly that I could see Lucy half reclining
with her head lying over the back of the seat. She was
quite alone, and there was not a sign of any living thing
about.
When I bent over her I could see that she was still
asleep. Her lips were parted, and she was breathing, not
softly as usual with her, but in long, heavy gasps, as though
striving to get her lungs full at every breath. As I came
close, she put up her hand in her sleep and pulled the collar
of her nightdress close around her, as though she felt the
cold. I flung the warm shawl over her, and drew the edges
tight around her neck, for I dreaded lest she should get
some deadly chill from the night air, unclad as she was. I
feared to wake her all at once, so, in order to have my hands
free to help her, I fastened the shawl at her throat with a
big safety pin. But I must have been clumsy in my anxiety
and pinched or pricked her with it, for by-and-by, when her
breathing became quieter, she put her hand to her throat
again and moaned. When I had her carefully wrapped up I put
my shoes on her feet, and then began very gently to wake her.
At first she did not respond, but gradually she became
more and more uneasy in her sleep, moaning and sighing occasionally. At last, as time was passing fast, and for many
other reasons, I wished to get her home at once, I shook her
forcibly, till finally she opened her eyes and awoke. She
did not seem surprised to see me, as, of course, she did not
realize all at once where she was.
Lucy always wakes prettily, and even at such a time,when
her body must have been chilled with cold, and her mind somewhat appalled at waking unclad in a churchyard at night, she
did not lose her grace. She trembled a little, and clung to
me. When I told her to come at once with me home, she rose
without a word, with the obedience of a child. As we passed
along, the gravel hurt my feet, and Lucy noticed me wince.
She stopped and wanted to insist upon my taking my shoes, but
I would not. However, when we got to the pathway outside the
chruchyard, where there was a puddle of water, remaining from
the storm, I daubed my feet with mud, using each foot in turn
on the other, so that as we went home, no one, in case we
should meet any one, should notice my bare feet.
Fortune favoured us, and we got home without meeting a
soul. Once we saw a man, who seemed not quite sober, passing along a street in front of us. But we hid in a door till
he had disappeared up an opening such as there are here,
steep little closes, or `wynds', as they call them in Scotland. My heart beat so loud all the time sometimes I
thought I should faint. I was filled with anxiety about Lucy,
not only for her health, lest she should suffer from the exposure, but for her reputation in case the story should get
wind. When we got in, and had washed our feet, and had said
a prayer of thankfulness together, I tucked her into bed.
Before falling asleep she asked, even implored, me not to
say a word to any one, even her mother, about her sleepwalking adventure.
I hesitated at first, to promise, but on thinking of the
state of her mother's health, and how the knowledge of such
a thing would fret her, and think too, of how such a story
might become distorted, nay, infallibly would, in case it
should leak out, I thought it wiser to do so. I hope I did
right. I have locked the door, and the key is tied to my
wrist, so perhaps I shall not be again disturbed. Lucy is
sleeping soundly. The reflex of the dawn is high and far
over the sea . . .
Same day, noon.--All goes well. Lucy slept till I woke
her and seemed not to have even changed her side. The adventure of the night does not seem to have harmed her, on
the contrary, it has benefited her, for she looks better
this morning than she has done for weeks. I was sorry to
notice that my clumsiness with the safety-pin hurt her.
Indeed, it might have been serious, for the skin of her
throat was pierced. I must have pinched up a piece of loose
skin and have transfixed it, for there are two little red
points like pin-pricks, and on the band of her nightdress
was a drop of blood. When I apologised and was concerned
about it, she laughed and petted me, and said she did not
even feel it. Fortunately it cannot leave a scar, as it is
so tiny.
Same day, night.--We passed a happy day. The air was
clear, and the sun bright, and there was a cool breeze. We
took our lunch to Mulgrave Woods, Mrs. Westenra driving by
the road and Lucy and I walking by the cliff-path and joining her at the gate. I felt a little sad myself, for I
could not but feel how absolutely happy it would have been
had Jonathan been with me. But there! I must only be
patient. In the evening we strolled in the Casino Terrace,
and heard some good music by Spohr and Mackenzie, and went
to bed early. Lucy seems more restful than she has been for
some time, and fell asleep at once. I shall lock the door
and secure the key the same as before, though I do not expect
any trouble tonight.
12 August.--My expectations were wrong, for twice during the night I was wakened by Lucy trying to get out. She
seemed, even in her sleep, to be a little impatient at finding the door shut, and went back to bed under a sort of
protest. I woke with the dawn, and heard the birds chirping outside of the window. Lucy woke, too, and I was glad
to see, was even better than on the previous morning. All
her old gaiety of manner seemed to have come back, and she
came and snuggled in beside me and told me all about Arthur.
I told her how anxious I was about Jonathan, and then she
tried to comfort me. Well, she succeeded somewhat, for,
though sympathy can't alter facts, it can make them more
bearable.
13 August.--Another quiet day, and to bed with the key
on my wrist as before. Again I awoke in the night, and
found Lucy sitting up in bed, still asleep, pointing to the
window. I got up quietly, and pulling aside the blind,
looked out. It was brilliant moonlight, and the soft effect
of the light over the sea and sky, merged together in one
great silent mystery, was beautiful beyond words. Between me
and the moonlight flitted a great bat, coming and going in
great whirling circles. Once or twice it came quite close,
but was, I suppose, frightened at seeing me, and flitted away
across the harbour towards the abbey. When I came back from
the window Lucy had lain down again, and was sleeping peacefully. She did not stir again all night.
14 August.--On the East Cliff, reading and writing all
day. Lucy seems to have become as much in love with the spot
as I am, and it is hard to get her away from it when it is
time to come home for lunch or tea or dinner. This afternoon she made a funny remark. We were coming home for dinner,
and had come to the top of the steps up from the West Pier
and stopped to look at the view, as we generally do. The
setting sun, low down in the sky, was just dropping behind
Kettleness. The red light was thrown over on the East Cliff
and the old abbey, and seemed to bathe everything in a
beautiful rosy glow. We were silent for a while, and
suddenly Lucy murmured as if to herself . . .
"His red eyes again! They are just the same." It was
such an odd expression, coming apropos of nothing, that it
quite startled me. I slewed round a little, so as to see
Lucy well without seeming to stare at her, and saw that she
was in a half dreamy state, with an odd look on her face
that I could not quite make out, so I said nothing, but
followed her eyes. She appeared to be looking over at our
own seat, whereon was a dark figure seated alone. I was
quite a little startled myself, for it seemed for an instant
as if the stranger had great eyes like burning flames, but
a second look dispelled the illusion. The red sunlight was
shining on the windows of St. Mary's Church behind our seat,
and as the sun dipped there was just sufficient change in
the refraction and reflection to make it appear as if the
light moved. I called Lucy's attention to the peculiar
effect, and she became herself with a start, but she looked
sad all the same. It may have been that she was thinking
of that terrible night up there. We never refer to it, so
I said nothing, and we went home to dinner. Lucy had a headache and went early to bed. I saw her asleep, and went out
for a little stroll myself.
I walked along the cliffs to the westward, and was full
of sweet sadness, for I was thinking of Jonathan. When coming
home, it was then bright moonlight, so bright that, though
the front of our part of the Crescent was in shadow, everything could be well seen, I threw a glance up at our window,
and saw Lucy's head leaning out. I opened my handkerchief
and waved it. She did not notice or make any movement whatever. Just then, the moonlight crept round an angle of the
building, and the light fell on the window. There distinctly
was Lucy with her head lying up against the side of the window sill and her eyes shut. She was fast asleep, and by her,
seated on the window sill, was something that looked like a
good-sized bird. I was afraid she might get a chill, so I
ran upstairs, but as I came into the room she was moving back
to her bed, fast asleep, and breathing heavily. She was holding her hand to her throat, as though to protect if from the
cold.
I did not wake her, but tucked her up warmly. I have
taken care that the door is locked and the window securely
fastened.
She looks so sweet as she sleeps, but she is paler than
is her wont, and there is a drawn, haggard look under her
eyes which I do not like. I fear she is fretting about something. I wish I could find out what it is.
15 August.--Rose later than usual. Lucy was languid and
tired, and slept on after we had been called. We had a happy
surprise at breakfast. Arthur's father is better, and wants
the marriage to come off soon. Lucy is full of quiet joy,
and her mother is glad and sorry at once. Later on in the day
she told me the cause. She is grieved to lose Lucy as her
very own, but she is rejoiced that she is soon to have some
one to protect her. Poor dear, sweet lady! She confided to
me that she has got her death warrant. She has not told Lucy,
and made me promise secrecy. Her doctor told her that within
a few months, at most, she must die, for her heart is weakening. At any time, even now, a sudden shock would be almost
sure to kill her. Ah, we were wise to keep from her the affair
of the dreadful night of Lucy's sleep-walking.
17 August.--No diary for two whole days. I have not
had the heart to write. Some sort of shadowy pall seems to
be coming over our happiness. No news from Jonathan, and
Lucy seems to be growing weaker, whilst her mother's hours
are numbering to a close. I do not understand Lucy's fading
away as she is doing. She eats well and sleeps well, and
enjoys the fresh air, but all the time the roses in her
cheeks are fading, and she gets weaker and more languid day
by day. At night I hear her gasping as if for air.
I keep the key of our door always fastened to my wrist
at night, but she gets up and walks about the room, and sits
at the open window. Last night I found her leaning out when
I woke up, and when I tried to wake her I could not.
She was in a faint. When I managed to restore her, she
was weak as water, and cried silently between long, painful
struggles for breath. When I asked her how she came to be
at the window she shook her head and turned away.
I trust her feeling ill may not be from that unlucky
prick of the safety-pin. I looked at her throat just now as
she lay asleep, and the tiny wounds seem not to have healed.
They are still open, and, if anything, larger than before,
and the edges of them are faintly white. They are like little
white dots with red centres. Unless they heal within a day
or two, I shall insist on the doctor seeing about them.
LETTER, SAMUEL F. BILLINGTON & SON, SOLICITORS
WHITBY, TO MESSRS. CARTER, PATERSON & CO., LONDON.
17 August
"Dear Sirs, --
"Herewith please receive invoice of goods sent by Great
Northern Railway. Same are to be delivered at Carfax, near
Purfleet, immediately on receipt at goods station King's
Cross. The house is at present empty, but enclosed please
find keys, all of which are labelled.
"You will please deposit the boxes, fifty in number,
which form the consignment, in the partially ruined building
forming part of the house and marked `A' on rough diagrams
enclosed. Your agent will easily recognize the locality, as
it is the ancient chapel of the mansion. The goods leave by
the train at 9:30 tonight, and will be due at King's Cross
at 4:30 tomorrow afternoon. As our client wishes the delivery made as soon as possible, we shall be obliged by your
having teams ready at King's Cross at the time named and
forthwith conveying the goods to destination. In order to
obviate any delays possible through any routine requirements
as to payment in your departments, we enclose cheque herewith
for ten pounds, receipt of which please acknowledge. Should
the charge be less than this amount, you can return balance,
if greater, we shall at once send cheque for difference on
hearing from you. You are to leave the keys on coming away
in the main hall of the house, where the proprietor may get
them on his entering the house by means of his duplicate key.
"Pray do not take us as exceeding the bounds of business courtesy in pressing you in all ways to use the utmost
expedition.
"We are, dear Sirs,
"Faithfully yours,
"SAMUEL F. BILLINGTON & SON"
LETTER, MESSRS. CARTER, PATERSON & CO., LONDON,
TO MESSRS. BILLINGTON & SON, WHITBY.
21 August.
"Dear Sirs,--
"We beg to acknowledge 10 pounds received and to return
cheque of 1 pound, 17s, 9d, amount of overplus, as shown in
receipted account herewith. Goods are delivered in exact
accordance with instructions, and keys left in parcel in
main hall, as directed.
"We are, dear Sirs,
"Yours respectfully,
"Pro CARTER, PATERSON & CO."
MINA MURRAY'S JOURNAL.
18 August.--I am happy today, and write sitting on the
seat in the churchyard. Lucy is ever so much better. Last
night she slept well all night, and did not disturb me once.
The roses seem coming back already to her cheeks, though
she is still sadly pale and wan-looking. If she were in any
way anemic I could understand it, but she is not. She is in
gay spirits and full of life and cheerfulness. All the morbid
reticence seems to have passed from her, and she has just
reminded me, as if I needed any reminding, of that night, and
that it was here, on this very seat, I found her asleep.
As she told me she tapped playfully with the heel of
her boot on the stone slab and said,
"My poor little feet didn't make much noise then! I
daresay poor old Mr. Swales would have told me that it was
because I didn't want to wake up Geordie."
As she was in such a communicative humour, I asked her
if she had dreamed at all that night.
Before she answered, that sweet, puckered look came into
her forehead, which Arthur, I call him Arthur from her habit,
says he loves, and indeed, I don't wonder that he does. Then
she went on in a half-dreaming kind of way, as if trying to
recall it to herself.
"I didn't quite dream, but it all seemed to be real. I
only wanted to be here in this spot. I don't know why, for I
was afraid of something, I don't know what. I remember,
though I suppose I was asleep, passing through the streets
and over the bridge. A fish leaped as I went by, and I leaned over to look at it, and I heard a lot of dogs howling. The
whole town seemed as if it must be full of dogs all howling
at once, as I went up the steps. Then I had a vague memory
of something long and dark with red eyes, just as we saw in
the sunset, and something very sweet and very bitter all
around me at once. And then I seemed sinking into deep green
water, and there was a singing in my ears, as I have heard
there is to drowning men, and then everything seemed passing
away from me. My soul seemed to go out from my body and
float about the air. I seem to remember that once the West
Lighthouse was right under me, and then there was a sort of
agonizing feeling, as if I were in an earthquake, and I came
back and found you shaking my body. I saw you do it before
I felt you."
Then she began to laugh. It seemed a little uncanny to
me, and I listened to her breathlessly. I did not quite like
it, and thought it better not to keep her mind on the subject,
so we drifted on to another subject, and Lucy was like her
old self again. When we got home the fresh breeze had braced
her up, and her pale cheeks were really more rosy. Her mother
rejoiced when she saw her, and we all spent a very happy
evening together.
19 August.--Joy, joy, joy! Although not all joy. At
last, news of Jonathan. The dear fellow has been ill, that
is why he did not write. I am not afraid to think it or to
say it, now that I know. Mr. Hawkins sent me on the letter,
and wrote himself, oh so kindly. I am to leave in the morning and go over to Jonathan, and to help to nurse him if
necessary, and to bring him home. Mr. Hawkins says it would
not be a bad thing if we were to be married out there. I
have cried over the good Sister's letter till I can feel it
wet against my bosom, where it lies. It is of Jonathan, and
must be near my heart, for he is in my heart. My journey is
all mapped out, and my luggage ready. I am only taking one
change of dress. Lucy will bring my trunk to London and keep
it till I send for it, for it may be that . . . I must write
no more. I must keep it to say to Jonathan, my husband. The
letter that he has seen and touched must comfort me till we
meet.
LETTER, SISTER AGATHA, HOSPITAL OF ST. JOSEPH AND STE. MARY
BUDA-PESTH, TO MISS WILLHELMINA MURRAY
12 August,
"Dear Madam.
"I write by desire of Mr. Jonathan Harker, who is himself not strong enough to write, though progressing well,
thanks to God and St. Joseph and Ste. Mary. He has been
under our care for nearly six weeks, suffering from a violent brain fever. He wishes me to convey his love, and to
say that by this post I write for him to Mr. Peter Hawkins,
Exeter, to say, with his dutiful respects, that he is sorry
for his delay, and that all of his work is completed. He will
require some few weeks' rest in our sanatorium in the hills,
but will then return. He wishes me to say that he has not
sufficient money with him, and that he would like to pay for
his staying here, so that others who need shall not be wanting for belp.
Believe me,
Yours, with sympathy
and all blessings.
Sister Agatha"
"P. S.--My patient being asleep, I open this to let you
know something more. He has told me all about you, and that
you are shortly to be his wife. All blessings to you both!
He has had some fearful shock, so says our doctor, and in his
delirium his ravings have been dreadful, of wolves and poison
and blood, of ghosts and demons, and I fear to say of what.
Be careful of him always that there may be nothing to excite
him of this kind for a long time to come. The traces of such
an illness as his do not lightly die away. We should have
written long ago, but we knew nothing of his friends, and
there was nothing on him, nothing that anyone could understand. He came in the train from Klausenburg, and the guard
was told by the station master there that he rushed into the
station shouting for a ticket for home. Seeing from his
violent demeanor that he was English, they gave him a ticket
for the furthest station on the way thither that the train
reached.
"Be assured that he is well cared for. He has won all
hearts by his sweetness and gentleness. He is truly getting
on well, and I have no doubt will in a few weeks be all himself. But be careful of him for safety's sake. There are, I
pray God and St. Joseph and Ste.Mary, many, many, happy years
for you both."
DR. SEWARD'S DIARY
19 Agust.--Strange and sudden change in Renfield last
night. About eight o'clock he began to get excited and sniff
about as a dog does when setting. The attendant was struck
by his manner, and knowing my interest in him, encouraged
him to talk. He is usually respectful to the attendant and
at times servile, but tonight, the man tells me, he was
quite haughty. Would not condescend to talk with him at all.
All he would say was, "I don't want to talk to you. You
don't count now. The master is at hand."
The attendant thinks it is some sudden form of religious mania which has seized him. If so, we must look out for
squalls, for a strong man with homicidal and religious mania
at once might be dangerous. The combination is a dreadful one.
At Nine o'clock I visited him myself. His attitude to me
was the same as that to the attendant. In his sublime selffeeling the difference between myself and the attendant
seemed to him as nothing. It looks like religious mania, and
he will soon think that he himself is God.
These infinitesimal distinctions between man and man
are too paltry for an Omnipotent Being. How these madmen give
themselves away! The real God taketh heed lest a sparrow
fall. But the God created from human vanity sees no difference between an eagle and a sparrow. Oh, if men only knew!
For half an hour or more Renfield kept getting excited
in greater and greater degree. I did not pretend to be watching him, but I kept strict observation all the same. All at
once that shifty look came into his eyes which we always see
when a madman has seized an idea, and with it the shifty
movement of the head and back which asylum attendants come
to know so well. He became quite quiet, and went and sat on
the edge of his bed resignedly, and looked into space with
lack-luster eyes.
I thought I would find out if his apathy were real or
only assumed, and tried to lead him to talk of his pets, a
theme which had never failed to excite his attention.
At first he made no reply, but at length said testily,
"Bother them all! I don't care a pin about them."
"What" I said. "You don't mean to tell me you don't
care about spiders?" (Spiders at present are his hobby and
the notebook is filling up with columns of small figures.)
To this he answered enigmatically, "The Bride maidens
rejoice the eyes that wait the coming of the bride. But
when the bride draweth nigh, then the maidens shine not to
the eyes that are filled."
He would not explain himself, but remained obstinately
seated on his bed all the time I remained with him.
I am weary tonight and low in spirits. I cannot but
think of Lucy, and how different things might have been. If
I don't sleep at once, chloral, the modern Morpheus! I must
be careful not to let it grow into a habit. No, I shall take
none tonight! I have thought of Lucy, and I shall not dishonour her by mixing the two. If need by, tonight shall be
sleepless.
Later.--Glad I made the resolution, gladder that I kept
to it. I had lain tossing about, and had heard the clock
strike only twice, when the night watchman came to me, sent
up from the ward, to say that Renfield had escaped. I threw
on my clothes and ran down at once. My patient is too dangerous a person to be roaming about. Those ideas of his
might work out dangerously with strangers.
The attendant was waiting for me. He said he had seen
him not ten minutes before, seemingly asleep in his bed, when
he had looked through the observation trap in the door. His
attention was called by the sound of the window being wrenched out. He ran back and saw his feet disappear through the
window, and had at once sent up for me. He was only in his
night gear, and cannot be far off.
The attendant thought it would be more useful to watch
where he should go than to follow him, as he might lose sight
of him whilst getting out of the building by the door. He is
a bulky man, and couldn't get through the window.
I am thin, so, with his aid, I got out, but feet foremost, and as we were only a few feet above ground landed
unhurt.
The attendant told me the patient had gone to the left,
and had taken a straight line, so I ran as quickly as I
could. As I got through the belt of trees I saw a white
figure scale the high wall which separates our grounds from
those of the deserted house.
I ran back at once, told the watchman to get three or
four men immediately and follow me into the grounds of Carfax, in case our friend might be dangerous. I got a ladder
myself, and crossing the wall, dropped down on the other side.
I could see Renfield's figure just disappearing behind the
angle of the house, so I ran after him. On the far side of
the house I found him pressed close against the old ironbound oak door of the chapel.
He was talking, apparently to some one, but I was afraid
to go near enough to hear what he was saying, les t I might
frighten him, and he should run off.
Chasing an errant swarm of bees is nothing to following
a naked lunatic, when the fit of escaping is upon him! After
a few minutes, however, I could see that he did not take note
of anything around him, and so ventured to draw nearer to
him, the more so as my men had now crossed the wall and were
closing him in. I heard him say . . .
"I am here to do your bidding, Master. I am your slave,
and you will reward me, for I shall be faithful. I have
worshipped you long and afar off. Now that you are near, I
await your commands, and you will not pass me by, will you,
dear Master, in your distribution of good things?"
He is a selfish old beggar anyhow. He thinks of the
loaves and fishes even when he believes his is in a real
Presence. His manias make a startling combination. When we
closed in on him he fought like a tiger. He is immensely
strong, for he was more like a wild beast than a man.
I never saw a lunatic in such a paroxysm of rage before,
and I hope I shall not again. It is a mercy that we have
found out his strength and his danger in good time. With
strength and determination like his, he might have done wild
work before he was caged.
He is safe now, at any rate. Jack Sheppard himself
couldn't get free from the strait waistcoat that keeps him
restrained, and he's chained to the wall in the padded room.
His cries are at times awful, but the silences that
follow are more deadly still, for he means murder in every
turn and movement.
Just now he spoke coherent words for the first time. "I
shall be patient, Master. It is coming, coming, coming!"
So I took the hint, and came too. I was too excited to
sleep, but this diary has quieted me, and I feel I shall get
some sleep tonight.